Where Am I Now?

It's been ten months since I last checked into this space. It was time to heal.

And now I am feeling better.


Then I was trapped in cycles of intergenerational trauma and lateral violence

Now I am free of chains

Then I was drowning in ancestral memories and pain

Now I am grounded and finding peace

Then I was struggling to take care of myself, to know that I was important enough to seek help

Now I am rested, and becoming healthy

Then I was a slave to my mental health struggles

Now I am able to manage my anxiety and depression

Then I couldn't sing a note

Now I feel the joy of music creeping through my fingers. I feel ready to perform again.

Then I was unsatisfied in my career

Now I have found a shift in career direction that is sustaining me on a financial, emotional, and creative level

Then I couldn't visualize even having a future

Now I see my future clearly


I'm not really sure how I got better. Time, mostly. Distance from toxicity. Exercise, medicine. Meditation. Slowing down. And of course, the support of my fiancee, and friends. The world is changing so fast and in many scary ways. It can be hard to value yourself, especially if you belong to a marginalized community. But please try to. Take good care of yourself. 

Where am I now? I am here. 

I hope  you are too. 


 

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